Practicing Patience

I thought this post was going to be about practicing patience with my children. There's been a lot of that going on in our house. Between the refusing to nap, the occasional fights over toys and all the other pitfalls of being a two children household; patience is in high demand in our house. But as I thought about it the person who I really need to practice patience with is myself.

I promised myself I would write more, and yet I find myself wasting more time worrying about having no time to write then actually writing. Then when I do write, I find that everything sucks. No, seriously I've got three essays going and you're just going to have to trust me when I say, "they suck". They don't suck beyond repair, mind you, but they do suck. My inner critic is working over time these days and mostly what she lacks is the patience to let me actually take the time to get things written. To her I say, 'slow down. These things take time. As long as I'm writing something, I'm winning the battle... so back off."

I promised myself I would excercise more patience with my kids. But, as I mentioned above I think the true test is can I be patient with myself when I forget to exercise said patience? After all, just as my kids are exploring the world for the first time and everything is new to them, so is being a parent new to me. How can I possibly know how I will react the first time anything happens , or for that matter how I'll react the gazillionth time something happens? It's all new.
To my inner mommy critic I say, 'slow down. You can only take this Mommy thing one day at a time. Kids are resilant and you'll all bounce back from a bad day. And the good days will carry you a long long way. Be patient with yourself, you are a good mommy'

I promised myself I would figure out (with many discussions involving my husband) our family economics, and where I want to go next in my career, and where to buy a house, and how to find time to organize the chaos that is my desk at home, and... and on and on goes the lists in my head at night when ( or is it why?) I cannot sleep. To the inner obssessor I say, "relax, slow down. Remember you are a Mommy of two, you are a wife, you are working a day job, you are running a show ,you are keeping a house running and you are struggling writer. Be patient, all these things will work out in time, they always do. Trust yourself, your love, and the universe. Give your mind a little quiet and peace"

Practicing patience is simply that "PRACTICING"