Thursday, December 29, 2011

True story - Paperclips and parenting 101

"If you don't put that paperclip down you're going to poke your eye out.  Then there you'll be in the back seat of the car trapped in your car seat with your eyeball poked out.  And then, because you are 6 and 1/2 and you can't help yourself, you'll pull the paperclip and your eyeball right out f your head.  Then where will you be?  Sitting in the backseat with your eyeball on the end of a paperclip and you'll just keep staring at it with your good eye and screamin' "AHHHHH!!!!!!"   Do you think your father or I will care?  No, we're just going to be getting the story ready in our minds.  The story that we will forever taunt you with year after year as well tell it every holiday season.  It will be known as, '2011, the year Noah poked his eyeball out screwing around with an unbent paperclip in the backseat of the car' story.  Is that how you want to remember your 7th Christmas on this earth?  Yeah, I didn't think so, give me the paperclip and find something better to do with your time."

True Story.   

I'm thinking about giving out parenting advice in 2012, clearly I've got the communication skills down.  




Thursday, December 15, 2011

Holiday Greetings 2011




Greetings from the Pacific NW. 2011 had many ups and downs. We are so grateful to our friends and families who were there to celebrate with us during the good times, and who lifted us up during the not-so good times. We hope 2012 brings you and yours much love and laughter. Below we hope you enjoy some random journal entries (in no particular order) of Carol Ann’s from 2011. Merry Christmas!

I realize that there are more important things going on in the world, but someone just told me I look like David Cassidy ala his Partridge Family days, might be time for a haircut.

Happiness tonight = Lucy wanting to snuggle on the couch with me until she fell asleep.

Why was I laughing hysterically at the kids crying at the breakfast table this morning? Noah was crying because he wanted to help his "favorite" sister by getting her a fork and Lucy was crying because her "favorite" brother wouldn't just let her do it herself. Generosity and Independence. Can't get much better then that on a Monday morning.
 
Happiness tonight = hearing the kids cracking each other up with nonsensical knock- knock jokes. All from their room where they are "sleeping"
 
Guess who’s husband continues to get a 4.0 in grad school?
 
Because it was so much fun the first time, Im going to do it again. Surgery #2 today! Can you feel the excitement ?
 
William (Bill) C Smith Sept 16, 1933- Sept 27, 2011.
Thanks for taking me fishing, sharing your love of books and music with me. I hope there's a never ending library wherever you are.

11 years ago today our eyes met across that smokey room.. This summer we’ll celebrate 9 years of marriage. That’s pretty awesome.
 
Today was L's first day of preschool. She was so excited! But, leaving her in the classroom, my big girl suddenly looked very small. I wanted to scoop her up and bring her home.

Home. Tumbled and jumbled on the couch with the kids. Now about to snuggle on the couch with my hubby and a beer. It's good to be here.

Patrick’s play, Continuum, had a terrific read at JAW this summer, I am so proud of him.
 
Holy cow! 3 weeks in the hospital and I can fit into my wedding dress again. I wouldn’t recommend this diet to friends and family, but I’m not going to complain.

I love that my kids believe I have the power to make the cross-walk change with my magic.
 
Cool misty morning. Perfect for our last summer walk to the library. Now we all sit reading quietly our pile of books. I'm so luck to have a family who loves to read as much as I do.
 
While never one to encourage the wasting of ice cream (horrors!) I am pleased to report that Lucy abandoned her bowl in favor of picking and eating some late pea pods. She announced they were much better then ice cream.
 
"Argh, who art thoo" - Noah
"WHAT!?!" Mommy
"Argh, who art thoo, that's pirate and middle ages for who are you" –Noah
 
The pie Patrick made me for my birthday this year had chocolate, raspberries, blueberries and whip cream. Oh, and some lemon.... it was awesome. I’m a lucky woman.
 
Took the kids outside tonight, they were whining about the heat. So, instead of baths I hosed them down. Seemed to make everyone happy.
 
Listening to the soundtrack of "Oklahoma" with the kids this evening. We came to the dream ballet and the kids were dancing, until the gunshot and the thunderstorm. Suddenly two scared kids... the power of music and the imagination. Luckily they stuck it out and it was once again, "Oh what a beautiful mornin’" Can’t wait to share the movie with them.

Happiness is playing Go Fish with the family. The giggle factor is very high.
 
Why is it no matter where the Stage Manager sits in the room, the Director will stand directly in front of them during blocking rehearsals?

Lucy still hates the noise of firecrackers, as well as lawn mowers, vacuums and just about anything that makes loud noises. Lucky for her Grandma W had a pair of earmuffs for her to wear. I think she’s going to wear them everywhere now!
 
"I am like the cockroach, surviving all the extinctions" ~Noah

Lucy has announced for her birthday in January there will be a princess bowling party, but without the pizza, that’s just for a boy party. She’ll have humus, thank you very much.

Thursday, October 6, 2011

Bill Smith - in his own words.


My Dad passed away Sept 27 at the age of 78. He was strong advocate for peace and social justice issues in the state of Iowa. As a child I knew he chose the cause over the paycheck, but I really had no idea just how much he did over the years. A few years ago he wrote a piece for a reunion he could not attend. It is with love I share with you in his own words just a few of his accomplishments over the years


Sixty years since graduating? What did I do in those years?

Well, right after graduation I served in the Navy and married my high school sweetheart, Mary Hoyt, who was still enrolled at St Luke's School of Nursing in Cedar Rapids.

The Navy sent me to Hawaii, my wife, Mary joined me after receiving her RN degree. We had our first daughter, Jerri Ellen, in Hawaii before being discharged in August 1957.

I was hired as a copywriter for the Fremont Guide & Tribune in Nebraska--where our second daughter, Theresa Eileen, and third, Robbin Marie, daughters were born. Worked for the Des Moines Register and Tribune as an Advertising Account Executive before returning to Nebraska for a better job.

Later my wife, Mary Louise, was diagnosed with acute monocytic leukemia. We moved "back home" to Iowa to be near family members. Mary died in March 1964. For the next four years I continued writing the employees' newsmagazine and other copy for Bankers Life Insurance Company, in Des Moines, now the Principal Financial Group.

Subsequently, I married my second wife, Bonnie who also worked for Bankers Life. We had a son who died at birth, then one more child--a fourth daughter, Carol Ann. In 1969 I was hired as Assistant to the Advertising Manager for Iowa Power and Light Company. My boss soon quit and I became Ad Manager. This job was not comfortable; I did not agree with management’s decision to promote Nuclear power. My disagreement was based on the fact that there was no industry-wide way to dispose of spent nuclear waste. There still isn’t. Needless to say, I started looking for other career opportunities.

Thus, I went to work for a small public relations firm with an option to buy. The owner of the firm was nearing 70, had a bad hip and was tired of the work, which was mainly lobbying. After a few years he had a heart attack and died. This should have been my warning sign of the stress of owning your own business and the long, hard hours of lobbying. It was not; I was buying the firm. Consequently, I had a five by-pass heart surgery in 1994. Through out the years I enjoyed being a professional lobbyist for a number of various clients. Dealing mostly with peace and justice and educational issues. The shortcoming of this quixotic perspective is that it was not very lucrative. You must love a career of helping others and enjoy being in the political arena. We helped the “under dog” and I stayed with it long enough to become an invited member of the “Pioneer Lawmakers" honoring those who have served more than 25 years as an Iowa State House Lawmaker or Lobbyist.

During my lobbying years, I was happy to help obtain the Iowa Educational Grant for the Private Colleges. Am delighted that College students are still able to benefit from this program. Also worked to pass the Iowa Family Farm Act, and was hired by the Iowa Podiatric Medical Society to be their Executive Director and Lobbyist. We lobbied to have the Iowa Podiatrists recognized as physicians when it was determined that their training justified the recognition and then added the ankle to their scope of practice and leg muscles to their Practice Act over the years. Also, the Child Day Care Centers group was another client for which we lobbied and improved their State Appropriations.

One of our most interesting challenges had to do with Iowa's General Practitioner shortage. The Iowa Medical School had a healthy number of specialists BUT not general practitioners. The Des Moines College of Osteopathic Medicine & Surgery (COMS) was graduating D.O.s who were, for the most part, general practitioners. At that time the COMS' President and the Iowa Governor came up with a plan: Iowa would subsidize COMS with $8,000 per student for a third of the entering class. We lobbied for this program and it went well for almost 20 years until the COMS' President was able to offset the subsidy with East Coast students, who were able to pay the high tuition. Unfortunately, the $8,000 per student went to the College, not to the students. Yet it helped with the doctor shortage, especially in Iowa's rural communities.

During Bishop Dingman's tenure we worked for the Iowa Catholic Conference. Which enabled me to work with him and other Iowa Bishops in a coalition with two farm organizations: the Iowa National Farmers Organization and the Iowa Farmers Union. This coalition worked for family farmers especially during the Farm Crisis of the 1980s. The Coalition's biggest success was the passage of Chapter172C, which disallowed Iowa meat packers from owning feedlots, which was in direct competition with our family farms.

It was during this period Bishop Dingman and Fr. Bryan Hehir prepared and published Strangers and Guests: Toward Community in the Heartland, under the auspices of the National Catholic Rural Life Conference. Much of the editing of this piece was done by Bishop Dingman's Rural Life Committee, which I was a participating member in Des Moines.


In the 1990s I lobbied for Iowa's eight largest School Districts. The client was really an association formed to counter a group of smaller schools. They were taking advantage of their large representation in the Iowa General assembly. The big issue was the Iowa Foundation Appropriation Formula's distribution and Iowa's reluctance to consolidate schools.

In 1980 we managed “The Committee to Protect the Constitution.” The Iowa Code offers this amendment opportunity every ten years. Any update, if so needed, is triggered by an Iowa Legislative Resolution, per the Iowa Constitution. The Governor has not role, but the Citizens of Iowa have a chance to vote on the "proposed amendments" after an amendment(s) have been processed and passed by two separate General Assemblies.

The need for this Committee was occasioned by a group of conservative " high rollers' headed by a former state senator author of a number of self serving amendments limiting taxes on upper income earners.

We countered with educational radio, TV and print ads. The Committee was constantly strapped for money. But in the end, with the help of two former Iowa Governors: Ray and Fulton along with retried Lt.Governor Art Neu we whipped Iowans for Tax Relief on the ballot issue in 1980 and again 1990. Thus we were able to keep the Iowa Constitution from being amended with our fund-raising, writing radio, TV and other media commercials and educating the people of Iowa. The ads were complemented with Public Service announcements (PSAs) telling why it was important to keep the Iowa Constitution as it is. This was a major accomplishment.

My wife, Bonnie, with her office administration and accounting experience ran the office and kept track of all the legislative amendments and coordinated clients visiting the State Capitol to talk to their Senators and Representatives. She also handled the Podiatrists' State Conventions and Continuing Education Seminars. As you can see, I was almost unnecessary.

We both achieved a lot of self-satisfaction with helping those in need. Looking back on the fifty years since leaving the halls of Loras College, I am content with what I have accomplished in my on-going life career

Our daughters have added to our family joy with three sons-in-law, seven grandchildren, and two great-grandchildren. Daughter, Jerri has three children and resides in St. Paul, Minnesota. She works as a Payroll Specialist. Daniel and Hayley are now both in college. David, the eldest son, served in the U.S. Army; now he and his wife live in St. Paul, with their two young children.

Other three daughters went West. They live in and around the Portland, Oregon area. Theresa is an Environmental and Recycling Specialist. Robbin has two boys, Nathan and Peter. Robbin works for the VP of research at OHSU. Carol Ann has a son, Noah who is in first grade and daughter, Lucy age 4 and is now in preschool. Carol Ann is stage manger for a theatrical playhouse in Portland.

Saturday, September 17, 2011

A boy and a dream

I'm back...

We had a great summer full of love and laughter. A few skinned knees and more then one bruised ego from time to time. But, no broken bones and no broken hearts (thank heavens... I'm not ready for that yet!) Many trips to the various fountains in the city, OMSI, parks and hikes.

N began the summer by wanting a paint-by-number dinosaur set. I shined him on most of the summer, only half listening to his request. After all this was a boy who EVERY TIME we leave the house wants to buy something new. "I never get anything new/I want/fun" was a common refrain. I was determined to break this habit. So, instead of really addressing it, I ignored it. Yeah, score -1 mom. Finally, we had an epiphany. Let's make the conversation about money a little more real.

Hence the talk about ALLOWANCE. After chatting with Patrick we decided that N could have an allowance of $1 a week. He could then begin to save for things that he wanted. Of course the first thing he wanted was the above mentioned item. It was ONLY $10. "That would take forever!" Really, did he have no faith in the wisdom of his parents? We explained for items that he wanted to buy during this allowance phase he only needed to save 1/2 the money and we would match the other half. He was also welcome to do some work to earn more money if he wanted. (This ratio will change as the dollar amount of his allowance goes up over the years, but it seemed like a good place to start)

So, with a new found determination he began to save. And he offered to wash the car! Well, who could turn that offer down. It was during our recent heat wave, so it was entertaining and practical. So after a couple weeks of saving and working he finally had his five dollars saved. (with $1.50 to spare!)




We proudly walked to our neighborhood art store (owed by Peter Rossing - a blast from my theater past). N went directly to his prize and only vacillated for a moment when he saw another dinosaur item. But he remained firm. He went to the register with box and bank in hand. Proudly counted out his $5 and watched as the clerk rang up his purchase. The whole experience was probably a little more profound for me, but it he seemed very proud of the transaction.

We came home and he spent the afternoon painting, waiting, gluing and waiting some more. And voila a finished project complete with winning smile!




Saturday, July 23, 2011

Summer Break



SUMMER BREAK. I'll be back soon.







Tuesday, June 7, 2011

4 years ago


Four years ago L had her open heart surgery at Dornbecher's Hospital here in Portland, Oregon. It hardly seems possible that the girl who danced in her first ballet 'recital' today was that same small fragile baby.

I remember much from that week, some of it strange, and nonsensical. Some intense and heart breaking. I remember it all.

I remember I had a migraine and refused medicine, I was afraid it would knock me out and I wouldn't be present if something went wrong.

I remember it going so fast and so smoothly, that I just couldn't believe it. This was open heart surgery, they said it could take HOURS, instead it took no time at all.

I remember reading the Mick Jagger/Johnny Depp interivew in Rolling Stone magazine outloud to her as she lie sleeping. I used bad british accents and every time one of them swore I would say, "bleep". This cracked me up to no end, I think some of the nurses just thought I was cracked.

I remember Patrick wrote a poem, it was beautiful.

I remember thinking they were sending us home too soon. It was OPEN HEART surgery, people. The drs were right, she thrived.

I remember how crappy the window seat bed was, but I slept there every night anyway.

I remember not wanting to leave her side, not even for a moment. Not even to go home and take care of N. (I knew he was being well taken care of)

I remember wanting Patrick by my side the entire time, but also pushing him away at times wanting to do it all myself.

I remember going to the Drammys and coming back to the ward smelling of cigarettes and sure I smelled like a distillery. It felt good, it felt wrong.

I remember the doctors faces, if I don't remember all their names.

I remember they said she's probably never need surgery on her heart again, and so far they are right.

I remember L, even if you don't. I'll carry those days in my heart always.



Wednesday, June 1, 2011

And now for something completely different


The Sacred Page

Hallelujah! Hallelujah!
Uproarious laughter
I want to be remembered in stolen kisses and midnight phone calls
My life is a prayer

Uproarious laughter
I kneel before the piece of paper
My life is a prayer
In phantom wisps of fog, the words disappear

I kneel before the piece of paper
Walls fly up, fast and furious
In phantom wisps of fog, the words disappear
The blank page wins, every blessed time

Walls fly up, fast and furious
I want to be remembered for my simple curry chicken salad
The blank page wins, every blessed time
Buut I am neither saint, nor sinner, merely mortal

I want to be remembered for my simple curry chicken salad
I want to be remembered in stolen kisses and midnight phone calls
The blank page wins, every blessed time
Hallelujah! Hallelujah!

~Carol Ann Wohlmut (C)

Friday, May 6, 2011

Spring 2011



Hey, it's been awhile! Wondering why? Well, let me just say a few things - grad school, theater schedule, Kindergarten, T-ball, chess club, ballet class, play dates, church, dr appts, stomach flu, spring allergies, spring colds, endless rainy days, random sunny days etc etc. Yeah, that sort of sums up the last few weeks for the Wohlmut family. Oh, don't get me wrong we are enjoying life for the most part, but some days we are overwhelmed with the business of living our lives.


Patrick and I often feel we are running a race together. A relay race. We are on the same team, but never on the track at the same time. Just constantly passing the baton back and forth as we run our laps. With our crazy schedules never quite allowing us to just walk a lap or two together, sometimes we have to drop the baton and just walk off the track. Today we did just that, we all played hooky.



Patrick had the day off from work, so L and I cancelled a play date, and we kept N home from school. We did so without warning, so it felt like a wonderful treat to the kids. (shh, don't tell N and L, but Patrick and I had actually cooked up the idea earlier in the week . A 24 hour stomach flu, almost destroyed the plans, but we didn't let it!) We had originally planned to go to the Coast but the weather seemed iffy (and that pesky theater schedule was flashing at me like a warning bell) so we opted to stay a little closer to home. We headed out to the Wooden Shoe Tulip Festival in Woodburn, Oregon. It was a quick drive, and although it was cool, a good time was had by all.



So, just what does one do at a tulip

festival on an "off-day" (the festival is apparently really rockin' on the weekends) with a 4 and 6 year old? Well, you mostly let them run in the play area, let them eat bad food, drag them to see the flowers, tell them repeatedly to slow down, and laugh uproariously. In other words you do what you always do with kids in tow, you give a little and you take a little.



Patrick and I opted not to eat the greasy food, but the kids were hungry and sometimes it easier to just feed them then listen to, "I'm hungry" ("really, I'm Daddy, nice to meet you") a hundred times. So, sure have a corn dog kids.

'There's nothing that a corn dog and strawberry lemonade can't cure. In fact my hearing has improved!" Speaketh N (hooray, now maybe he'll hear us when it's time to pick up, put shoes on, bathe, etc)






There were large wooden shoes to stand in, tire swings shaped like horses to ride, bumpy slides, and rows of flowers to explore. Truly it was a good day.


So here's the kicker. Not five minutes after leaving the tulip farm I hear from the backseat, "I'm hungry... I was really hoping to go to the zoo....or OMSI...can we stop at the art store...." I wish I could say that I took it all in stride and didn't take it personally. Because, I get it. Life at this age revolves around them. The activity was fun, but it's over now and what's next? But, it feels like a kick in the head sometimes. Sigh... I found myself using an ugly tone of voice, attempting to explain that they should be grateful for the day they had. That actually, No, we don't always say no. Didn't we say yes to the cow train? Didn't we say yes to the corn dogs and lollipops? Blah!



And let's not forget my inner dialogue which went something like this "I'm just gonna tell Patrick to take this car straight to the homeless shelter, I'm gonna show them just why they should be grateful. They think I say no now, wait until the next time they want me to read "Fancy Nancy" for the 17th time, yeah and yeah..."



It was not my finest moment, not because I don't think they could use a reminder of how good our life really is, no because I fell into their trap and made it be about me. And the point of the day was to have a good time as a family and relax. And we did, and it truly was a great day. And they won't remember that they didn't go to OMSI or the zoo. They will remember riding the cow train and laughing at silly knock knock jokes in the car. And that's what I'll remember, too.


So, here's to deep breaths and rolling with the punches. Now... I'm hungry.











Monday, January 31, 2011

The promise of spring

Before the January "cold" returned this morning (I say with apologies to the majority of the country east of the Rockies who are buried in snow and wind) we had a week of"balmy" weather. It happens every Winter here in the Pacific NW. We get a few days of sunny, warm weather. The kind that makes you shed your heavy coats in favor of hoodie (or if you are a stubborn 4 year old, no coat at all) and sunglasses. It's glorious, and this year I received it more greedily then other years, I think perhaps because I still haven't recovered from 2010 the year that the Grey/Rainy season lasted until July.

Usually what happens when the false spring days arrive, I get carried away by the prospects of spring and I buy plants and dig in the garden. Some of the heartier plants survives while others
just barely cling on when the reality of February hits. So, this year I embraced my need to dig in other ways.

Ms L and I painted Terra Cotta pots and then filled them with dirt and seeds. Of course, true to her 4 year old "but I want it now" nature she anticipated seeds coming up within minutes of planting. When, under her watchful eye, that didn't happen, there was much concern and a flurry of activity. "They need more water," she insisted while pleading with me to bring in the watering cans from outdoors. "They need more light," she pleaded with me to move them to the library book chair where more sunlight could be had. It took a lot of words and persuasion to convince her that she'd just have to wait.





"Well okay, (insert a visual and audible harrumph here)I'll wait until
tomorrow." )